With Belief In Self. A Way To Live. (1 Minute Read). 

Today, you will not be beset by challenges, but by opportunities to claim personal victories. You will not be guided by ignorance, but by morals and ethics, to do the right thing always and walk away from the wrong. Finally, your heart and mind will not be in conflict. You have found the balance to live in contentment, with a positive attitude and a by principle which renders help to others, makes them smile and brings you happiness. 

Belief in self makes you wealthy, healthy and confident to accomplish everything on which you’ve set your mind. It is a dynamic concept where you let the world fall away around you momentarily and all that remains is you. And in that time you take good stock of who you are, what you are worth, what you have to offer yourself and your conviction to have your victories.

It is always nice to hear others say that they believe in you. It might be life changing to hear those words from your own mouth. A person who believes in themself never experiences doubt. Doubt is the root of all defeat and fear and this is not what your life needs. A life lived with self belief is a life destined for victory.

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Finding Contentment Before Happiness. (1 Minute Read).

Finding Contentment Before Happiness. (1 Minute Read).

A woman finally bought a beautiful painting she had set her heart on for years. It took her a long time to save the money for the work of art and quite a bit of sacrifice. But now, the sashes and strokes of colours, hues and details were in her hands and she could not stop smiling. ‘Where should I hang it?’ she thought to herself. ‘Where will you look the most beautiful in the house?’ 

Hours passed. The woman hung the painting from every wall in her house, but was not satisfied with how it looked. She pulled down every ornament and picture she had in the house and replaced them with the painting, but every time the lighting was wrong, the direction it faced was awkward and at times the wall was too short for the painting’s length, that it fit crookedly. 

Days passed. The woman just could not find the perfect place for her painting. Then she thought perhaps the placement did not matter, but the colour of the wall did. She was no art expert but maybe the painting contrasted badly with the wall paint. She would fix that. Out came the paint buckets. She could not paint just one room. She would have to paint all the walls so she could find the best one with the new colour. 

Weeks passed. The house was repainted, but the painting still did not look perfect anywhere it was hung. Weeks became months and months became a full year and the painting sat leaning against the living room wall of the woman’s house. Every night after work she would sit and stare at it and wonder why she could not find the perfect place for it. She felt sad. Moreover, she felt like her heart was unsettled and all her sacrifices had gone to waste. 

One day a friend came over to visit the woman. When the person saw the painting unceremoniously leaning against the wall they asked what was wrong with it. The woman explained her dilemna. Her friend laughed. Annoyed, by the response the woman asked what was funny. Her friend apologized and explained that perhaps the painting looked perfect in the art gallery she found it in and it may never look the same way anywhere else. Maybe the lady didn’t fall in love with the painting, but with the way it looked where it was and that setting was difficult to replicate. But now the painting was in the best place it could ever hope to be, because it found a home leaning on the wall on the floor, where it would be admired by the woman every day. 

Not every thing in life will be perfect for us. But we should not turn our lives upside down just because one thing does not work out for us. Many times, even our expectations for our lives are too unrealistic and when things don’t add up, we feel like we have failed ourselves. In such cases, we really need to appreciate the things we already have. Furthermore, we must appreciate the way things worked out, even when they were bad, for there are valuable lessons to be learned in our failures. It is in the nourishment of contentment that happiness will find its roots and flourish. 

Be The Victor, Not The Victim. (1 Minute Read).

Be The Victor, Not The Victim. (1 Minute Read).

It’s nice to complain to others about the things that bother and worry us. It’s nice to have a listening ear for our concerns. It’s nice to know that people will empathise with us and give us comforts and assurances which will make us feel good about ourselves. I read somewhere, that the things that make us feel nice, soon become addictive. The good feelings we get, from being the center of attention, because of our problems, are hard to deny and we constantly have the urge to feed them, by complaining even more.

But, sooner or later, our complaints get old, boring and annoying. However, this doesn’t stop some people from finding new things to complain about. Before long, these persons identify themselves as victims. Victims of life, victims of the world, victims of society, victims of economics, victims of the system, victims of politics and the list goes on. What they fail to realise however, is that they have become victims of themselves.

What is it to be a victim of yourself? It’s when you, as an individual, stop taking responsibility for the actions which got you into problems in the first place. Because your actions can always be blamed on the perceived scheming/actions/doing of someone else, you will never feel the need to be accountable for the things wrong in your life. Soon, the victim persona emerges and life becomes inconsequential, because everyone else is to blame and everyone else has to fix your problems for you.

In their need to feed the shallow feelings of importance, victims become even more defeatist in their approach to life. They begin to believe that life owes them and when the debt isn’t paid, they feel depressed, betrayed and lost. That is until someone new and understanding pays heed to them.

Victims can save themselves. They can rise above their problems and they can live productive lives. When faced with an issue, instead of decrying it’s existence and blaming everyone else for its presence, people need to sit and try to figure out how to fix the problem. After the problem is solved, a little introspection is required of course, just in case the issue arose because of your actions. Owning up to, solving and then learning from your mistakes, are the first steps to being a victor in your own life. And, that’s a good feeling to have.

The Last Time? But We Weren’t Ready To Forget. (30 Second Read).

The Last Time? But We Weren’t Ready To Forget. (30 Second Read).

This could be the last time you read this blog. Why do I say that? Well, life is so remarkably unpredictable and fickle, that for some reason yet to be known or forseen by me, I could call this blogging business quits. I’m just saying. We really never do know, if and when, somethings we are accostomed too, will cease to exist. And pretty soon, we forget about them. I am not saying this will happen, I’m saying it can. 

Take for instance the music playlists on radio stations. At the height of their popularity some songs are played over and over and over. As new songs are released and gain popularity, the previously popular tunes get relegated to the bottom of the playlist and after a while they get removed. Think about a once popular song that you enjoyed listening too. Can you remember the last time you heard it played? At that time, did you think that this would be the last time you would hear it for a very long time or never again? 

Our brains work the same way. New information and data gets stored over the old constantly. Soon we forget we had some memories locked away inside us and we never expected that our lives will push us farther away from them. We never expected that there would be a last time for them.

Think about someone you never ever saw again and the last time you did.

A place you love and never visited again.

A book you read countless times, and never picked up again.

The last time you said your deceased pet’s name or had a memory of them.

The last time you had a good feeling you wished would never go away. 

Do you remember the days of good health and a stress free life?

When was the last time you had childhood memories? 

The beauty of life is also the saddest part; it moves on, endures and thrives, but because of this, we forget, replace and change. 

The old saying goes ‘we should live each day and experience as if it were our last.’ We should also expect that some blogger will make us remember those ‘last time moments’ in our lives, and inspire us to revisit them for the first time in a long time.

How’s That? The Attitude Tho. (1 Minute Read).

How’s That? The Attitude Tho. (1 Minute Read).

Unless you are living under a rock, you would have heard the saying, ‘It’s not what’s said, but how it’s said’. Sadly, there are many under-a-rock dwellers among us. Their time locked in with their ignorance, has put them at an apparent evolutionary disadvantage. They never developed the social communication skills required to live and thrive in a civilized and understanding environment. 

Knowing how to speak to people you come into contact with on a daily basis, requires no small amounts of politeness, graciousness and tact. I haven’t even mentioned qualities such as empathy or skills such as active listening. Verbal communication will deliver the ‘what is being said’, while paralanguage will determine the ‘how it is being said’. Since non verbal communication is decoded in conjunction with the verbal communication, it’s necessary to manage the use of paralanguage properly in the verbal package. 

Basically, be careful with how you say things to others, since more meaning is deduced from paralanguage, than from the actual content. It raises problems, if the way things are said is misunderstood in the context of what was said and the other accompanying contexts. 

You should always be mindful that some people are very sensitive to tones, intonation and general bad attitudes. Others simply do not have any tolerance for ignorant, dismissive and ‘holier than thou’ complexes. 

As a general rule, if people know they tend to aggravate others around them whenever they crawl out from under their rocks, they should just practice the art of shutting up, if they cannot monitor their paralanguage. If they wish to join a civilized conversation, they should cultivate some sensibilities and understanding first. They will find that others will gladly receive their messages without feeling insulted or uncomfortable. 

If you are on the receiving end of bad verbal attitude, it’s very important to exercise patience and restraint in your response. Consider if the affront is warranted given the situation. If it isn’t, stand up for yourself and your dignity and make it clear that you are not familar with degenerate attitudes and as a human being, you wish the other person would converse with you in a much better and humane manner. 

Fighting Complacency: It’s An Eye Opening Experience. (1 Minute Read).

Fighting Complacency: It’s An Eye Opening Experience. (1 Minute Read).

When things stay the same for a very long time, we tend to get comfortable and somewhat complacent with our situations. We follow the logic of ‘if it ain’t broke, then don’t fix it’. But, how do we really know something is broken, if we do not step out of our comfort zones and objectively subject it to thorough analysis? How do we know that our current situation is not a threat to our personal development? How can we be certain that we are making the most out of our one chance in this world? Most people have fallen asleep in their lives and have failed to test their circumstances and situations with a view to have better, be better and hope for better.

Thus, some of us need to wake up and open our eyes to the world around us. Have you ever tried opening your eyes after a deep sleep to a room flooded with light? It’s a very disorienting and sometimes painful experience and the urge is to suddenly close your eyes once more. Such is the struggle. Such is the pain. But, this is exactly what we must do, to stop seeing the darkness in our complacency and start adjusting our sights to light of the real world. Eyes, well adjusted to light, will never be weak again. If you have lived your life or done certain things one way only, it’s going to be hard to change those behaviors. It will not be accomplished overnight, or tomorrow or next week. But, people need to start at some in time and that is half the battle already won.

The human instinct for improvement and advancement has worked hand in hand with our evolution. The more we influenced our situations and environments, the more our bodies and minds changed to match those adjustments. The task of re-wiring our minds to think in a different way has its rewards and benefits, the biggest of which is knowledge. Wiping away the old ways from our heads and filling our minds with new information and wisdom is a step in the right direction, to combating the complacency we have cemented in our lives.

Things We Always Have And Can Share With Others. (30 Second Read).

Things We Always Have And Can Share With Others. (30 Second Read).

A Smile: Custom made, Free and will almost always be returned. The best currency in a simple non-verbal transaction. 

Best Wishes: Wishing someone a great day, Happy Birthday or Congratulations never takes anything out of us. They only count if they are genuine.

Good News: Spreading good news is as simple as telling others you woke up this morning, you are healthy and intend to make it through your day with a positive attitude.

Greetings: It takes an extremely grumpy person to declare to themselves that they are out of Good Mornings and Good Nights to share with others and refuse to say it to those they meet. Greetings are common courtesy and like Best Wishes need to be said genuinely.

Love: This is not a romantic type of love, but the care and compassion you feel for those around you. It’s being interested in the things that make them happy and doing things to show them that they are important.